Open Mind, Open Heart
Something I’d like to do more of in 2020 and beyond is spend time listening and interacting with people whose political opinions are different from my own. This has proved challenging in past years because I lacked the confidence and knowledge to articulate my beliefs and why I believe them.
I am getting better, but practice, real in person practice, is critical to my forward progress. In order to resist, I must fully understand what I am resisting and why it is imperative I continue to resist.
Simply put, I refuse to put my head in the sand and just say “that’s how it’s always been” or “it could be worse.” Just because something isn’t horrible or as bad as it could be doesn’t mean it isn’t my responsibility to make it better, or at least try.
Putting this into practice, I decided to get lunch with my dad, a man with complete opposing views to my own. There’s no need to digress into it, other than to say that spending too much time with my parents is very bad for my mental health. But a bit of exposure therapy here and there can honestly only make my beliefs stronger.
I also find it valuable to separate my father from his political, religious and ethical views. I need to see him as my dad, a man I love, even with the disagreements we have.
Before the lunch, I didn’t have much anxiety because I asked him to come out to a restaurant and I prepared myself. I told myself we were steering clear of most political things, and if I felt myself getting upset or triggered by him, I would remind myself that his views are dying out and sometimes I need to grin and bear it. I decided to choose love over being right.
For this first time, until I think he can handle it, I will keep my opinions or what the actual facts are (science denier) and choose to see him with love. He’s my dad, and I love him.
I asked good old Twitter to help me concisely think about my 2020 challenge, and this phrase stuck out to me.
Choosing to love even when people aware wrong.
Open mind, open heart.