bringing the razzle dazzle

I signed up for the Dark Anchor 34H back in September in a fit of injury induced impulsivity. I knew my injuries were healing but it was so God-forsaken slow that I needed something to look forward to in 2024. Four months. I could be ready in four months right? I was turned onto this race by fellow runner Patrick Reagan, who lives in Savannah, GA and could not say enough about the community and trails down there. Patrick is a running ultrarunner, his style of racing fits with where my body also seems to thrive, so I trusted him and RD Jason Green, who is absolutely hilarious and always been super kind to me over the internets. I think he’s invited me to the Yeti 100 every year for the past three years (I promise I’ll get there Jason I promise). His style and attitude made me want to see what the Yeti Trail Runners were all about.

I was able to race twice before heading down to Georgia. I ran a 50k in the beginning of November and a 50M at the beginning of December. Though not stellar performances by any means, they were solid blocks building up the confidence I had lost in my racing this past year. The pain of injury is real and it hurts to have to use appendages that are not functioning properly. However my biggest hurdle is my confidence in my body to continue to do these distances. Little twinges that I would have paid no attention to a few years ago now linger in my subconscious, stressing me out even when I don’t know I am thinking about it. My training is 70% mobility and strength drills, which help loads, but also remind me that my body doesn’t work correctly. The week before each of these races is a stressful few days of finding new injuries, old niggles, and pains I forgot existed. I know everyone goes through this, but my mind likes to overdo it and I don’t sleep well when I am unsure of how my legs will feel when they touch the ground the next morning.

A typical night goes like this:

I get in bed by convincing myself that rest is the best thing for me in this moment and I did everything I could during the day to help heal and progress. Everything seems fine. About two hours later I wake up and decide that for my peace of mind, I should get up and test it. Do a hop or walk to get some water instead of continuing to rest, because I think this will help ease my stress. It never does because of course after laying prone for 2 hours it will take my legs a second to warm up. I convince myself that I have a niggle. I get upset. I try to calm down, make a contingency plan for the next morning, the next week, the next month, and 5 years down the line. Finally I somehow get back to sleep after doing so.

SEE WHY NOTHING HEALS FOR ME?!?!?!?!?!

I am fully conscious of doing this and every night is not like that, just the ones before a race or if I felt something weird that day. I usually talk myself down pretty well, but I’d be lying if I said I am cool as a cucumber all the time. The night leading up to Dark Anchor, I felt some soreness in my peroneal tendon, which runs along the outside of the shin down the foot. This tendon had something to do with an injury I had last December, so though not painful at all, I could feel “something” and that was enough. Usually I text my PT and coach just to get it out there. I want to tell someone because keeping it inside is worse. My biggest worry going into Dark Anchor was not my own personal pain, but if my mom and sister saw me in pain. That was something I did not want them to experience because the format of the race made it really simple for spectators to see us each hour, I wanted them to see the best sides of ultrarunning.

After I signed up for the race, I decided to offer my sister a paid flight to join me as her Christmas gift. She accepted readily and then my mom also expressed interest in coming. Southern states in the middle of January look really nice to us Northerners. I did not think my mom would ever be interested in my running (more to come, she is very supportive of it now) so after my shock wore off, we decided to see this as a vacation for us having not seen each other for the holidays. It all sounded great until I remembered that ultras are hard and look silly to those unaccustomed to them…and I didn’t want my mom to be turned off to the sport I participate in. I know I thought about this much more than she did…but I really wanted her to see how much I loved this sport and the other people in this community. To sum it up, I really really really didn’t want an injury to pop up that left me limping not just at the race, but for the rest of our vacation.

It might seem as though I only look at negative signs in the lead up to races. This is untrue. I also allow my brain to work in the opposite way. I made it to the bus on time (good omen), the line for TSA took about 3 minutes (good sign), I remembered syrup for my airport pancakes (good karma), my fight was on time (WOOO!!!), our AirBnb had comfy beds, (hell yes!), we found a delicious Thai restaurant for pre-race dinner (nailed it!). All these things helped me not think about my worries and allowed me to enjoy my time with my mom and sister. They also had good travel and had a solid race day plan. They would drop me off, then do their thing for 6 hours, and then come back. My sister said she wanted me to be good and tired if I asked her to run with me. She ended up running 12 miles off the couch with me, so I’d say she’s made the right call.

The race itself was very well put together. Base camp was set up with tents and food. Each lap was 3.5 miles marked by the crossing of a timing mat. My intention for this race was either 100k or 12 hours, whichever came first I would be happy with. I also wanted to be cognizant of my family’s time as standing/sitting outside all day is in itself an ultra event. The loops had no elevation and were nice packed dirt trails with some classic east coast roots and rocks. I quite enjoyed the loop and honestly never felt mentally bored. The first 30 or so miles went along quite well and I felt like I was out for a Sunday run with friends. After that point, I could see where the race format gets tough. My hips and legs never had to change gait patterns to account for going up or down. It wasn’t overuse really, but an ache, a craving for some other sort of stimulation. I had a tough 10 miles where I thought my pace slowed to a crawl and I had to remind myself of the race goals: finish 100k and get more confidence in racing, no matter how slow. Every loop I told myself I would walk the next loop. That little carrot kept me going longer than I’d like to admit.

At mile 40, my mom and sister had come back and I asked my sister to run with me. I think having her, plus these tortillas with peanut butter and M&Ms (we called them the razzle dazzle) gave me a pep in my step and I started to pick up my mood if not my pace. She did so well just ran next to me chatting and did a lot more than she was expecting. It was really special for me to share those miles with her and also have our mom watch us do that together. At mile 52 she decided to keep my mom company and I was in that ultra mindset of slow jogging where I knew I could finish the 62 miles. I think my mom was also thrilled that she wouldn’t have to sit there in the wind for 12 hours, but for 10. I cruised it home and stopped just as dusk settled over the tent city. I was able to chat with Jason for a few minutes and promised I’d come back tomorrow to cheer and help if I could. My mom and sister and I went back to the AirBnb, had dinner, and capped the night with a season of the Great British Bake Off. I ended up going back the next day to walk 13 miles with one lady attempting to finish 100 miles. Oh man those people at the end of a 34H race are something else. Everyone is still chipper, but definitely in that haze of utter exhaustion. What a sight to see!

Will I do another? That’s the question isn’t it? To be honest, I am not sure yet. I really loved the format and loops being just long enough for me not to get bored and runnable. However I am not sure my body is up to the task of doing 24 hours or 100 miles in that format. I need a few different strategies to help out my hips and knees, which I should have used earlier in the race to prevent the onslaught of soreness. Apparently Camille does pick-ups during those things and stretches. This is why she’s the GOAT and I am a peasant. What I actually loved the most was sharing miles with my sister, so I think any race that I do like that I would like want her to come too.

Now…a Backyard Ultra? I actually didn’t mind the stopping because I am so chatty…which meant it took me longer to cover the distance that it normally would. However a race where I have to stop and talk is like giving sugar to a rat. I think I could keep going as long as I could talk at the end of each loop. Better put in a call to my pal Harvey…